By Atiq Raja
In today’s world, where likes, shares, and comments often define self-worth, the need for validation has become deeply ingrained in our society. Many of us find ourselves chasing external approval, hoping that the praise of others will confirm our value. Yet, this need for validation is often a barrier to genuine self-growth and fulfillment. Shifting our focus from external validation to self-ownership can lead to a healthier, more resilient personality. This article explores why ownership matters more than validation, how to reduce the need for validation, and the transformative effects this shift can have on our lives.
Why Validation Can Limit Personal Growth:
Validation is the acknowledgment or approval from others that reinforces our actions, choices, or sense of self. While validation can feel satisfying, relying on it too heavily can undermine our ability to develop a solid self-identity. When we prioritize others’ opinions over our own, we may:
Lose Authenticity: We start to act in ways we believe others want, sacrificing our own desires and values.
Develop Insecurity: Constantly seeking approval can lead to self-doubt and make us dependent on others to feel worthy.
Limit Self-Exploration: Our growth becomes restricted to what is socially acceptable, rather than what we genuinely want to achieve.
Although validation can initially provide comfort, it prevents us from developing true ownership over our lives and decisions, a mindset that fosters genuine growth and resilience.
Why Ownership Matters More Than Validation:
Ownership means taking responsibility for your thoughts, actions, and self-worth. Unlike validation, ownership is internal; it empowers you to set your own standards and define success based on personal goals. Embracing ownership helps to:
Build Self-Confidence: When you own your choices and values, you become less reliant on others for confidence, finding self-worth from within.
Encourage Growth: Ownership allows for honest self-assessment and encourages constructive change without fear of judgment.
Foster Independence: By defining your own measures of success, you become less influenced by the ups and downs of external opinions.
Ownership is about understanding that your worth and your journey are unique and do not require external validation to be meaningful. Letting go of validation is a gradual process, requiring patience and conscious effort. Here are some strategies to help you cultivate ownership:
Practice Self-Reflection: Regularly ask yourself what matters to you. Reflecting on your values, passions, and strengths helps to develop self-awareness and separates your goals from societal expectations.
Set Personal Goals: Define goals based on your values rather than what others might expect from you. Aim for achievements that genuinely matter to you and fulfill your sense of purpose.
Learn to Embrace Failure: Validation often creates a fear of failure because we want to avoid judgment. Instead, view mistakes as opportunities to grow. This mindset reinforces resilience and builds confidence in your abilities, regardless of others’ opinions.
Limit Social Comparisons: Constantly comparing yourself to others, especially on social media, reinforces the need for validation. Focus on your own journey and celebrate your unique progress.
Surround Yourself with Supportive People: Engage with people who respect you for who you are, not for what you achieve. Supportive friends or mentors will encourage you to stay true to yourself rather than seeking superficial approval.
The Positive Impact of Letting Go of Validation on Your Personality
Increased Authenticity: Releasing the need for validation allows you to live authentically, making choices that align with your true self. This leads to a deeper sense of satisfaction and fulfilment, as you no longer feel compelled to fit into societal moulds.
Improved Emotional Resilience: Without the constant worry about others’ opinions, you become more resilient and better equipped to handle criticism and setbacks. You understand that your worth is not defined by others’ perceptions but by your own standards.
Enhanced Confidence and Independence: As you rely less on external validation, you gain confidence in your decisions and abilities. This independence fosters a stronger sense of self-worth and encourages you to take risks that support your personal growth.
Greater Focus on Growth: Without the distraction of seeking approval, you can focus more on self-improvement and working toward your true goals. Your energy becomes directed toward achieving personal milestones, enhancing your skills, and pursuing meaningful challenges.
Balanced Relationships: Relationships based on ownership rather than validation tend to be healthier and more balanced. When you no longer seek approval, you contribute to relationships with honesty and respect, fostering a mutual appreciation for each other’s uniqueness.
Embrace Ownership, Transform Your Life:
Replacing the need for validation with ownership is a powerful shift that can elevate your personality and enhance your life’s quality. By owning our choices and letting go of the need for constant approval, we can cultivate a more fulfilling, resilient, and authentic sense of self. Embracing ownership doesn’t mean rejecting the opinions of others entirely but rather valuing your inner voice above all. When we become our own source of validation, we can live a life marked by authenticity, confidence, and purpose.
(The writer is a rights activist and CEO of AR Trainings and Consultancy, with degrees in Political Science and English Literature, can be reached at news@metro-morning.com)
